This one is a bit more serious than my usual blogs, but I was asked today why do I write a blog, I gave my standard answer of just for shits and giggles, but kept the real reason to myself.
In my own way I have always felt the best way to express frustrations and address things that worry me is to try to laugh them off. Even if this means writing a humerous blog while I sit on the recliner in my underwear avoiding the folding pile and the dishes after a work day this is just what I do.
So thinking back now to just how my parenting journey began, I feel even more the need to put it out there.When I had my child I spent the first four months completely confused I would cry alot, it was a mix of wow this little human is perfect and we created her to OMG I am awful at this what am I doing wrong.I found it hard and I have no issue in admitting it was hard, I eventually found my feet at around the 6 month mark with a supportive group of moms who were worth their weight in gold for the first 12 months.
I made a decision to return to work, I had an 8 month old baby obviously sleep deprived and thought it was reasonable to return to work fulltime. It was much earlier then expected but I was walking the tightrope between career and mother.
I was disappointed with how I was as a mother I had always visioned myself being the cook everything from scratch, follow the parenting books and raise a genius type of mum.
It could not be further from what I was or am I was kidding myself for even thinking I would be that. I had never even been a cook from scratch type of girl or domesticated by any means. When I met my eventual husband I was a ruff and tuff ringer who could not cook rice let alone anything else.
So here I was with a baby girl who refused to sleep, I lived off copious amounts of caffeine and would quite readily load the trolley with pre made baby food, canned food and stuff that could be heated in the microwave if need be.
I found I always second guessed myself then it happened a light bulb moment. No why should I be disappointed with myself look at this amazing little human she is happy healthy and doesn’t judge me at all, I started joking with friends about how it really is and quickly came to realise most of us are in the same boat. We all have left the washing build, fed our children two minute noodles and been so sleep deprived we started thinking the Wiggles could actually be a great rock band in that big red shiny car.
So I stopped listening to the self-appointed experts and decided to parent my way and share it with those who at some point may need to laugh and say OMG this could be me.
It worked I saw that yes it is hilarious that I have had dirty diapers thrown at me, tantrums in the shopping centre and been out maneuvered on too many to count occasions by my child, but that is ok.
I stopped for a while but now I know how much it helped me to reach out put my hand up and say parenting is the tuffest gig so far that is why I am writing again.
If out of all this all that results is I lay all my mistakes out for people to judge I hope at one point I also get a smile.
Happy days parenting warriors xo